Monday, August 9, 2010

Russian Man Dies of Needless Leisure Activity

During the World Sauna Championship, a Russian man died and a Finish finalist was hospitalized. Vladimir Ladyzhensky collapsed after spending six minutes in a 230º Fahrenheit room. He suffered severe burns on his skin. Organizers say that all participants are required to get a doctor's authorization before they enter wooden boxes heated to the temperature at which you cook a turkey. After the two were taken away by ambulance, another competitor is reported have muttered half to himself, "pussies."

The World Sauna Championship is a yearly event that arose, undoubtedly, over a bet between two drunken Nordic men. Purportedly, in order to determine who is more manly, the Finish government is working on technology to deliver shirtless, burly blond men to the surface of the sun to see who can last the longest.